British politeness

[Daedalus]

Have you heard about this? What do you think?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/10280244/Translation-table-explaining-the-truth-behind-British-politeness-becomes-internet-hit.html

[LauraM]

This is the first I have heard of this.  Thanks for sharing.  Being an American I can't vouch for the accuracy, but some of the disparities in meaning are quite amazing, to the point of being amusing.  But not so much so, if there is this kind of misunderstanding between people!  It could lead to some awkward situations. 

This one in particular really struck me:

What the British say: "With the greatest respect"

What the British mean: "You are an idiot"

What foreigners understand: "He is listening to me"

It's worth checking out the whole list.  Collectively, they are really astonishing.

[SpiralArchitect]

I remember going to England on a student exchange program when I was younger and this cultural disparity was a bit shocking. Here I am sitting and thinking I am being praised when the opposite was happening.  :wacky:

[limon]

It's the root of that famous dry British wit

[sayitwell]

It's the root of that famous dry British wit

That is exactly it.  A little bit of Orwellian double speak, eh?  How ironic.  Personally, I can't stand the British accent for anything more than a couple hours.  It just wears on my ears.  And they seem way too snobby to me.

[cynthia738]

That's not a nice man, some people have British accents and they can't stand Americans accents either.

[jodiann12]

That is exactly it.  A little bit of Orwellian double speak, eh?  How ironic.  Personally, I can't stand the British accent for anything more than a couple hours.  It just wears on my ears.  And they seem way too snobby to me.

This table is not a surprise to me. British people are fake! They never say what they mean and they never mean what they say! I always watch their body language whenever they are saying something. When you look at their facial expression, and even hear their tone, you know for sure that they don't actually mean what they are saying.

[DiesIrae]

I find it hilarious and am actually planning to learn about this just so I can use it on a roleplaying game I play as a way of insulting someone without being direct. Thanks for the link. Although I don't think this type of thing is limited to the British. I can understand the invite for dinner because in the Philippines, we usually say that to people who would drop by and we're not really expecting them to eat with us, we just want to be polite, which can be also confusing to foreigners.

[Lorigh]

This is interesting to me, because many Southerners do the same thing. When we say "bless her heart", we don't really mean that in a good way. It's a bad thing.

[Trellum]

That was really funny... it'd explain a lot things!  I have a british friend who is sometimes to polite, but sometimes he also says the most random and odd stuff all of a sudden.  So I'm not sure if that table applies to him or not. 

I used to think brits said it the way it is, but it's kinda odd this article points to a totally different direction    I guess it depends a lot on the person you're dealing with; not everyone is the same. Each person has her/his own personality.

[Beverly]

LOL I showed this to my husband and he pointed out the part

"I would suggest ===>  Do it or be prepared to justify yourself  "

and said 'ohey look they speak your language" 

[BWL]

My grandfather's generation grew up under British rule so I guess he would have been more of an expert on this matter than myself. I think there definitely is a grain of truth in it. Another nation with people who do not necessarily mean what they say (but perhaps in a less sarcastic way) are the Swedes. The Swedes as a rules dislike being controversial and to argue, to the point of hiding their feelings in order to keep the other party happy. I've noticed this trait among many Swedish friends! While British wit is often a form of nicely-veiled form of sarcasm, the Swedes will simply not say anything for fear they will say something offensive!

[melisapink]

That is exactly it.  A little bit of Orwellian double speak, eh?  How ironic.  Personally, I can't stand the British accent for anything more than a couple hours.  It just wears on my ears.  And they seem way too snobby to me.

Maybe you have been watching too many Brits being depicted in American TV programs, as they always seem get it wrong. We don't all sounds posh, we aren't snobs, we don't all drink tea 24/7, we're not obsessed with the queen, and we don't dress like Mary Poppins either! Lol. There are like 10,00000 different accents here! I don't think I know one person that sounds how you describe and if I did meet such a person, they would be pretty much an outcast.

Also, if I were to judge any one person from a cross section of people that I had met or even seen on TV from one part of the world, I think that would make me look like the 'snob' you speak of? I know someone who just did that and it sure wasn't me, 'The Brit'.

Let's all be nice to each other for a change, eh? Everyone is not one person just because of where come from. Use your logic and just get on with it  :wacky:

[melisapink]

This table is not a surprise to me. British people are fake! They never say what they mean and they never mean what they say! I always watch their body language whenever they are saying something. When you look at their facial expression, and even hear their tone, you know for sure that they don't actually mean what they are saying.

If possible, I would like to ask that you to read your comment and ask yourself "Is it fair to call all people fake because of where they live, just because of their culture?"

Also, if what you describe above did happen to be the Brits way of using their language, then they have every right to do so. Brits speaking to Brits would clearly be aware of this way of conversing with each other and there would be no hidden meaning in it for them. I am sure other countries, cities and cultures have their own ways too. Some words means things to some and vice versa, mostly not on purpose.

I have been to other countries where I get barged into in the street for example, and don't receive so much as a 'sorry'. This would be seen as absolutely disgustingly rude where I live, but as I am open minded and have some logic about me, I know that this is their culture and I have no right to storm into their country and tell them how to act, no slate them to death.

I am open minded and am aware that what may seem strange to some is in fact normal to others and can see that they are not being intentionally hurtful.

[ghanashyam]

If possible, I would like to ask that you to read your comment and ask yourself "Is it fair to call all people fake because of where they live, just because of their culture?"

Also, if what you describe above did happen to be the Brits way of using their language, then they have every right to do so. Brits speaking to Brits would clearly be aware of this way of conversing with each other and there would be no hidden meaning in it for them. I am sure other countries, cities and cultures have their own ways too. Some words means things to some and vice versa, mostly not on purpose.

I have been to other countries where I get barged into in the street for example, and don't receive so much as a 'sorry'. This would be seen as absolutely disgustingly rude where I live, but as I am open minded and have some logic about me, I know that this is their culture and I have no right to storm into their country and tell them how to act, no slate them to death.

I am open minded and am aware that what may seem strange to some is in fact normal to others and can see that they are not being intentionally hurtful.

That must be India. Here people do not offer to say " sorry" unless you catch him by collar and demand it.

But there is no system like this itself. People just push the people on the crowded roads and nobody bothers to look around who pushed him.

I do not mind the British though, it must be their system in which they were brought up and in some countries people are brought up different way. I also admit that Americans carry the impression being very impolite and rude, I cannot say the reason.

But here in India also, while parting with a visitor on road we will say " Come to my house someday, we shall have a cup of tea." and I assure we never intend to invite the visitor.

[justusforus]

I had to believe this was a humorous piece but with some truth (although I am not British).  Looking at the whole list, there are many of these I think Americans say as well with a slightly different meaning:

WHAT THE BRITISH SAY      WHAT THE BRITISH MEAN                    WHAT FOREIGNERS UNDERSTAND

I hear what you say  I disagree and do not want to discuss it further  He accepts my point of view

(I think in America when we say "I hear what you say" it really means "I have no idea how or what to say to you" as they shake their head up and down)

That is a very brave proposal        You are insane                        He thinks I have courage

(In America (especially in the workplace) if we say "that is a very brave proposal" we mean "better you than me to suggest such a thing!" )

Very interesting                                That is clearly nonsense                    They are impressed

(Again in America I think "very interesting" means "I don't know what to say to that" and I am not really going to waste my time so I will just throw the conversation back to you)

Could we consider some other options    I don't like your idea                They have not yet decided

(In America, I think "could we consider other options" means "why did I hire someone like you who comes up with such things.  I can't believe I have to start from scratch and do it myself"

      These are just a few and my personal opinion.  Although the British are reputed to be "polite" I think Americans may also use the English language to either soften the blow of what would be and insult or to totally disengage from the conversation.

[Monox D. I-Fly]

This thread reminds me to Canadians who are often stereotyped as "always kind and polite". Are they "fake", too?