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21 Conversational Tricks That Make People Want to Talk to You

21 Conversational Tricks That Make People Want to Talk to You

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Small talk doesn’t have to be a chore. In fact, it can be the key to turning a casual encounter into a memorable connection. But too often, it feels like we’re stuck in the same old script: “How are you?” “What do you do?” “Seen any good movies lately?” Yawn. The truth is, great conversationalists aren’t magical beings with endless wit—they just know how to sprinkle a little conversational spice into their exchanges.

Think of it this way: a good conversation is like a dance, and knowing the right steps (or in this case, phrases) can turn a clumsy shuffle into a smooth waltz. The right words have the power to open doors, spark curiosity, and make the person you’re talking to feel truly heard and appreciated. It’s not about talking more; it’s about talking smart.

Want to go from forgettable to unforgettable in your next chat? You’re in the right place. Here are 10 conversational tricks that aren’t just useful—they’re downright fun to use. These phrases will have people leaning in, nodding along, and genuinely enjoying the exchange. Ready to shake up your small talk game? Let’s get started!

Key Takeaways
🗣️ Ask Engaging Questions: Go beyond the typical small talk questions and invite storytelling, reflection, or sharing of experiences to make conversations more meaningful and memorable.
👂 Show Genuine Interest: Demonstrating active listening by picking up on details and encouraging elaboration makes others feel valued and creates deeper connections.
❤️ Create Emotional Bonds: Tap into feelings and personal experiences to build rapport. Asking about emotions or showing empathy fosters trust and connection.
💬 Invite Diverse Perspectives: Encourage others to share their viewpoints. This approach leads to more dynamic conversations and shows openness to different ideas.
🎉 Keep It Fun and Light: Use light-hearted or imaginative questions to break the ice and add a sense of playfulness, making conversations more enjoyable.
🔥 Focus on Passions: Encouraging discussions about what excites or motivates someone creates more engaging and energized exchanges.
📚 Share New Insights: Introducing interesting facts, ideas, or recent readings can add value and stimulate more thought-provoking dialogue.
🤝 Validate and Empathize: Acknowledging others’ feelings and viewpoints, even in disagreement, helps keep conversations respectful and constructive.
📝 Ask for Stories and Advice: Encouraging people to share their wisdom or experiences not only enriches the conversation but also shows that you value their input.

1. “What’s the most interesting thing that’s happened to you lately?”

Forget the bland “How are you?” This opener invites someone to share a story or moment that’s meaningful to them. It’s like giving them a free pass to brag or reflect on something that brought them joy or surprise. Not only does it break away from the typical small talk mold, but it also gives you insight into what excites or matters to them. This question says, “I’m here for the good stuff, not just the polite pleasantries.”

2. “I’d love to get your perspective on this…”

Everyone likes to feel that their opinions are valued. This phrase is a subtle but powerful way to show that you’re genuinely interested in what the other person thinks. It can open the door to deeper discussions and signal that you’re not just a passive listener but actively engaged. It works wonders when you’re navigating new or sensitive topics. It takes the pressure off being “right” and places emphasis on the exchange of ideas.

3. “I noticed you mentioned… Can you tell me more?”

Active listening is more than nodding your head; it’s about picking up on details and showing that you’re truly tuned in. This phrase demonstrates that you’ve been paying attention and are curious to know more. For example, if someone casually mentions a hobby or recent trip, this follow-up can encourage them to elaborate, sharing stories or insights they might not have otherwise. It’s an invitation to deepen the conversation.

4. “What’s a project or hobby you’re really excited about right now?”

Let’s face it—people love talking about their passions. This phrase shifts the conversation from the mundane to the meaningful by focusing on what lights someone up. It’s an easy way to find out what makes someone tick, leading to more animated and enjoyable exchanges. When someone talks about what excites them, their enthusiasm becomes contagious, and the conversation naturally becomes more engaging.

5. “I completely understand what you mean, I’ve felt the same way…”

Empathy is a conversation game-changer. This phrase is like a shortcut to building rapport because it taps into shared experiences or emotions. When someone feels understood, it builds trust and creates a bond. It doesn’t just acknowledge their feelings—it reinforces them. Just be sure to genuinely mean it; nothing ruins a conversation faster than a hollow or forced empathy line.

6. “You’ve really made me think about…”

There’s no better way to leave someone feeling valued than by letting them know their words have had an impact. This phrase is perfect for those moments when someone’s point of view has sparked a new thought or challenged your perspective. It shows that you’re not only listening but also considering their input thoughtfully. It’s a great way to keep the conversation flowing and deepen the exchange.

7. “I’m curious, how did you get started with…?”

This is a fantastic way to get someone to open up about their journey or background. It works well in professional settings or when meeting someone for the first time. Whether it’s their career path, a unique hobby, or an interesting skill, people love sharing their stories of how they began. It’s personal without being invasive and provides a natural segue into deeper discussions about their passions and experiences.

8. “I read something recently that…”

If you want to inject fresh energy into a conversation, introduce a new idea or interesting fact you’ve come across. This phrase positions you as someone who’s always learning and brings something new to the table. It could be an article, a book, or a random fun fact—it adds value and often invites the other person to share something they’ve read or heard too. It’s an easy way to elevate small talk to something more stimulating.

9. “What’s your take on…?”

When you want to keep the conversation lively and thought-provoking, this phrase works like a charm. By directly inviting someone to share their opinion, you create an opening for a more engaging discussion. Whether it’s about current events, a recent movie, or even a philosophical idea, this question says, “Your thoughts matter to me.” It encourages deeper dialogue and mutual respect, even if opinions differ.

10. “I never thought about it that way, that’s an interesting point…”

Validation is key to a good conversation, and this phrase does just that. Even when you don’t agree, acknowledging a different viewpoint shows maturity and openness. It can help diffuse tension, keep things respectful, and encourage the other person to continue sharing. This phrase is a simple but effective way to make someone feel heard and appreciated, paving the way for richer conversations.

11. “What’s something you’re looking forward to?”

Shifting the focus to the future can immediately bring out positive emotions and energy. Asking about what someone is excited about or anticipating invites them to share upcoming plans, dreams, or goals. It’s a great way to learn more about what drives and excites them, moving the conversation away from the mundane and towards something more personal and hopeful. This question can help build a connection based on shared anticipation and optimism.

12. “Tell me about a time when…”

Asking someone to share a specific experience invites storytelling and brings depth to the conversation. Whether it’s “Tell me about a time when you overcame a challenge” or “when you felt truly happy,” this phrase helps uncover personal anecdotes that can lead to richer and more memorable exchanges.

13. “How does that make you feel?”

This phrase touches into the emotional layer of a conversation, encouraging the other person to reflect on their feelings. It’s a great tool for deepening discussions, especially when someone shares something significant or meaningful. It shows that you care about their emotional experience, not just the facts.

14. “I’ve been thinking a lot about… What’s your take on it?”

Introducing a topic you’ve been pondering with this question can lead to a rich, collaborative exchange of ideas. It shows that you value the other person’s opinion and are genuinely interested in different perspectives. This approach is especially useful in intellectual discussions or when exploring complex issues, as it encourages deeper conversation and mutual understanding.

15. “What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?”

People love sharing wisdom they’ve gained over the years. This question not only encourages them to reflect on valuable lessons but also offers you the chance to learn something new. It’s a great way to uncover meaningful stories and insights that go beyond everyday small talk.

16. “What’s one thing you’re passionate about that most people wouldn’t guess?”

This phrase uncovers hidden interests or lesser-known hobbies, which can be a delightful surprise and lead to unexpected topics. It also shows that you’re interested in understanding the person beyond the surface, making the conversation more engaging and personal.

17. “How did you learn to…?”

This question invites the person to share their learning journey, whether it’s a skill, a hobby, or a professional achievement. It allows them to open up about their experiences, challenges, and triumphs, adding depth to the conversation. It’s especially useful when discussing unique talents or expertise.

18. “What’s your biggest takeaway from…?”

This phrase can be applied to any recent experience—whether it’s a book they’ve read, a trip they’ve taken, or a project they’ve completed. It encourages reflection and deeper thinking, making the conversation more meaningful by focusing on lessons learned rather than just surface details.

19. “If you could have a superpower for a day, what would it be?”

This light-hearted and imaginative question is great for breaking the ice and adding a fun twist to any conversation. It allows people to be creative and playful while sharing a bit about their personality and wishes.

20. “What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet?”

This phrase taps into the realm of aspirations and unfulfilled desires. It can spark interesting discussions about dreams, fears, or even bucket list items, providing insight into what excites or challenges the person you’re talking to.

21. “What’s something that always makes you smile?”

Ending on a positive note, this phrase is designed to bring out a person’s happy thoughts or memories. It can instantly shift the mood of the conversation and leave both of you feeling uplifted and connected on a more joyful level.