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This is really a case by case and it depends on the intentions of the person/the language you are learning. If the person actually meant what they say and it was a verbal attack, then no, that's not okay. But what we don't know (because we are not fluent in the language) is that there is slang in every language and "offensive" words to us might have a different meaning in that language. For example, we have words in Cantonese slang that literally mean "stupid" or "naive". But when used in slang, it means "clumsy" -- which is not derogatory. The word itself in the dictionary still has the meaning "stupid", but when used in context, it means something else. So yeah... it really depends on the person who's saying it.

I think it is entirely up to you if it will be difficult or not. You said you just want to learn the basics in Mandarin to entertain your girlfriend. In that case, it may not be as demanding as the way you want to learn the Japanese language. I cannot see any confusion with the objective you have in mind. Perhaps it will be difficult if you will learn both seriously. I think it will be even fun. Anyway, if you do get confused in the process, you can always drop Mandarin.

I do believe that some languages are easier to learn than other ones. For example, English is much easier to learn in comparison with Japanese, for example, simply because it is encountered all around us (especially on the internet), it has easier grammar and you don't need to learn 3 alphabets to write it. Also, the more you like how a language sounds, the more likely you are to master it quicker.

I have had people say that and I usually reply that I 'just like to talk a lot and that I'm not embarrassed to humiliate myself on a regular basis so it makes it look like I'm comfortable, and therefore to a quick eye fluent. But that I still have a long way to go.' What I hate is when my language skill is compared to my husbands. He is quiet by nature and a good listener. But people will say right in front of him, 'You are good in the language but he is not'. This must hurt his feelings and it has made me begin to not speak as much when we are together in public. I want him to have a chance to be heard. Its not fair to compare people's language skills in that way. He is incredible in so many other facets of culture, language and communication that it really makes me want to scream. But I know people are trying to give me a compliment.

I hate it when people put you down for wanting to learn another language. When I was just beginning to learn Spanish a lot of people would make fun of me for not saying words properly. I didn't get why they were being so rude. I thought they would be happy to know that I wanted to learn their language.

I totally agree with you. Name calling is just rude, no matter if it is done out of a joke or not. And that is especially true for someone struggling to speak an unfamiliar language, because it may make you loose confidence in yourself and may make you think that you are not really good at what you are trying to do.

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