In these days of communicating by text or video calls, there are still reasons to write letters.
You might write a cover letter for a poetry submission, or you might write an open letter if there is an issue you feel strongly about. However, there are still reasons to write personal letters as well.
A letter can be a great way to apologize.
It says that you are making the effort and going the extra mile to show that you are sorry for something that happened.
For example, you might write an apology letter for not attending an event.
Everyone makes mistakes sometimes.
If you want to have a successful relationship with your girlfriend, the key is not to strive for never making a single mistake, which just isn’t possible, but what you do next after making that mistake.
Of course, you should always do your best, but you’re only human, and sometimes you might be thoughtless or rude to your girlfriend.
When this happens, instead of just apologizing to her in person, you can write her an apology letter that acknowledges what you did wrong.
You can use one of the examples below based on your own situation to help you craft a letter that will do this.
1. Dear [Name],
Last week when you were upset about something that happened at work, I was dismissive about your concerns. You wanted to talk about it, and I said that I didn’t want to hear it and that I wished you would stop bothering me with it.
That was wrong of me, and I should have stopped what I was doing and listened to you. I’m very sorry. I want you to know that I do care when you are upset, and I am working on being better about listening and paying attention to you.
I don’t expect you to stop being angry right away, but I hope you’ll give me a second chance. You really are the best thing that ever happened to me.
2. To my sweetheart,
When we first got together, you were worried that I was overly dedicated to my work and that I didn’t have time for you in my life. I swore that wasn’t the case, but I know that lately, it has seemed like the opposite is true. I’ve allowed my work to overtake everything else in my life, including you. And I’ve made it seem like nothing is more important to me than my job when that’s the farthest thing from the truth.
The most important thing about my job is that it enables me to treat you to the nice things that you deserve and will help support the family that I hope we’ll have together someday. I’m making some changes in my work schedule and my approach toward my job to better balance it with everything else in my life, most of all you.
I’m sorry that I didn’t do this sooner. I can only hope that you’ll recognize how sincere I am and that you’ll stick around to see how much better I can be.
3. My dear [NAME],
I know that I have betrayed you in one of the worst ways possible. I’m so sorry. There’s nothing I can say to change that although if I only had one wish in my whole life, it would be to alter the past so that it never happened. I can’t do that, but I can promise you wholeheartedly that it will never happen again.
All of this has made me realize how incredibly lucky I am to have a woman like you in my life. I love you so much, and I understand if you feel like you can’t trust me any longer and want to move on. But I hope you’ll see how sincere I am and allow me to start showing you from this minute forward how much you mean to me and what a great partner I can be to you.
I know you need some time to think about things, so I will let you make the next move. Please know that you are on my mind constantly, and all I want to do is make you happy.
4. My sweetheart,
I can’t believe I was so inconsiderate to you last week. I completely forgot that we had made plans and I scheduled that game with my friends at the same time. I know this looks like I value them over you, but nothing could be further from the truth.
What is true is that I was thoughtless and inconsiderate, and what I did certainly makes it seem as though you’re not a priority in my life.
Please know that this is not the case. No one is more important than you, and I’m determined to start showing you how much I mean that.
I am very sorry for the way I’ve treated you, and one way I think I can show you how sincere I am with that apology is by sharing my Google calendar with you. This demonstrates my complete transparency to you and also will help me get better about paying attention to how I schedule my time.
I want to be clear that I’m not asking you to manage my schedule for me. This is on me, and it’s something I absolutely have to fix on my own, but I hope this will make you feel more like you are a part of my life.
As another step toward making this up to you, I’d like to take you out to dinner next week absolutely anywhere that you want to go. And I promise I won’t leave you waiting all night this time! Please let me know when you’re ready to talk. I love you.
5. Dear [NAME],
I lost my temper with you in public last week, and that was wrong. I know that it was embarrassing for you and that I should be mature enough to better control my emotions. In fact, that kind of behavior wouldn’t be acceptable in private either.
I have signed up for an anger management class and am also on a waiting list for a therapist to try to help me get a better handle on these emotional outbursts. In the meantime, I don’t expect you to bear the brunt of that anger, and I understand if you want to keep your distance for a while. However, I can promise you that this will never happen again.
I want to work on the underlying causes of my anger, but I have the ability to control the actions that result from my anger right now, and going forward, I plan to do this. I’m very sorry for putting you through this. You mean the world to me. I hope you’ll consider giving me the opportunity to make things right. I love you, and I want the chance to start showing you just how important you are to me.
6. Dear [NAME].
I’m sorry that I haven’t been doing my share of chores around the house. I know you talked to me about this just a couple of weeks ago, not for the first time, and I promised to do better. At this point, you probably think this is just another empty promise. But I am genuinely sorry for my neglect, and I am making changes starting today. You’ll see that I’ve left the kitchen spotless and that I’ve also mowed the lawn.
I know that nobody enjoys household chores, and it’s selfish and inconsiderate for me to blow them off with the knowledge that you’ll be stuck with them if I don’t bother. You mean so much to me, and I haven’t been treating you the way you deserve to be treated. That changes now. I love you and I want to make this work.
7. My dearest love,
You said you needed some time away to think about things, and I hope this letter isn’t interfering with that. I’ve wanted to call or text you a hundred times a day, but I’ve respected your request. But I did want to let you know that I am thinking about you almost constantly and that if you decide you want to continue in this relationship, I’m going to do everything I can to show you how much you mean to me.
I’m sorry for all the times I haven’t considered your feelings or haven’t followed through on the things I said I’d do. There’s no excuse for it. I can’t say that I will be perfect in the future because nobody is, but I am going to do everything in my power to be the man that you deserve.
You don’t need to write an answer to this letter. I want you to take as much time as you need and not feel like you have to get back to me on anything. I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you, and you’re the most important person in the world to me. I love you, and I’m going to start acting like it.
8. Dear [NAME],
The first time I met you, I said to myself that anyone who had a woman like you in their life would be the luckiest man in the world. I know how lucky I am, yet I don’t show you that at all.
I know that it seems as though I take you for granted even though in my own mind, that’s not the case. I am always marveling at how wonderful you are and how much I love you. And yet, for some reason, I don’t communicate that to you.
I am going to start, and this letter is the beginning of it. I want to change, and I intend to do so. From now on, I won’t just assume that you know how I feel about you. I will tell you every day. When you do things for me, I will thank you instead of acting as though they are my due or worse, acting like I’m irritated by you.
I know that it might be too late. All I can say is that if you decide to stick with me, I think you’ll find that I am a changed man. I am sorry that I have not shown you how important you are to me. You mean the world to me. Please let me start demonstrating that to you.
9. Dear [NAME],
This morning I went through my apartment and poured out all the alcohol that I had left. I realize that you are right and that for me, there’s no such thing as just one drink. Once I start, I can’t stop, so because you mean everything to me, I’m never going to start again.
I’m looking into a program that will help make sure that I’ve quit for good, but nothing is more important to me right now than telling you I’m sorry. You’ve put up with a lot from me, and none of it has been fair. I take responsibility for my own actions, and I don’t expect to put any of this on you.
I hope we can fix things though. My life won’t be the same without you in it. It won’t have the sense of joy that you bring to it. I miss your smile. I miss everything about you. When you’re ready, please think about giving me a call so we can talk about it. I love you, and I apologize for how things have been. I promise that if you decide to come back to me, everything will be different.
10. My dearest love,
I’m sorry I have been so inconsiderate to you lately. I’ve had a lot going on with work and family problems, but I know that isn’t your fault or your responsibility. There’s no excuse for taking it out on you, and I want to make it up to you.
I’d love to take you for a weekend away to our favorite spot up by the lake. I promise I won’t spend time on my phone there; I’ll even give you my phone or leave it at home if you want me to! I just want to show you that I can give you my full attention and that you deserve it. I also want to make up for the way that I’ve been snapping at you and not treating you the way you should be treated.
I hope you’ll accept my apology. It was wrong of me to treat you the way I have the last few weeks. You’re everything to me, and it’s time I started acting like it.
11. My sweetheart,
I hope you will accept my heartfelt apology for my words and actions. I know I have already told you I’m sorry in person, but I wanted to write this letter to emphasize that I know that I’m in the wrong.
I’ve been tired and stressed out lately, but that’s no excuse. You are the most important person in my life, and I’ve been treating you like you are the least important. That’s the last thing I ever wanted to do.
I realize I have a long way to go to regain your trust, but I hope that I can do so, starting right now. If there’s something that you need from me that I’m not providing, please tell me. I want to be the person that you deserve.
To show you how much I mean this, I’ve canceled my trip planned for next weekend. I’d like to spend that time with you instead, but I understand if you’re not ready yet. Just know that I’m here when you’re ready to talk to me again. I love you so much, and I want the chance to show you that again.
12. My dear [NAME],
I can’t believe I forgot your birthday. I could make a lot of excuses, like saying that you know I’m bad with dates or I’ve been working a lot lately, but all they would be is excuses. The truth is that there is no excuse for being so thoughtless around a wonderful woman like you.
I am so sorry. I know how important this day is for you, and my actions in no way reflect my feelings about you or how much I value you in my life. Words alone are empty though. I can’t redo your birthday, but I can plan a great weekend at the beach for us to try to make it up to you.
I know you’ve been saying for months that you wanted us to take a vacation, and I keep saying that I’m too busy. I realize now that it sounds like I’m saying I’m too busy for you, especially when I can’t even remember something as important as your birthday. It will never happen again.
I’ve made reservations for two at your favorite place on the beach. I want to take you out for dinner, and we’ll spend the weekend doing whatever you want. You don’t have to say yes, but I hope you will. Happy belated birthday, my love. I’m sorry, I was wrong and I want to make it up to you.
13. Dear [NAME],
When you told me you wanted me to come to your family reunion, I admit that I didn’t react in the right way. For some reason, I got cold feet, and I can’t explain that at all. It doesn’t reflect how I feel about you or how seriously I take our relationship. I’m sorry that my first response was to say that I didn’t think I could go. I now know how much your family means to you and how much it means to you for me to accompany you.
I apologize for my hesitation. I want to come with you, especially now that I have a better understanding of why it matters so much to you.
You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, and the last thing I want is to throw that away over me doing something stupid. Let’s talk again when you’re feeling up to it, and I’ll go ahead and schedule the time off work to join you. I love you.
14. My baby,
I’m sorry that I lied to you. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship, and I’ve broken that trust. I realize that it will take a long time to rebuild it, but I hope we can start doing it today.
I could give you explanations or excuses for why I lied, but the truth is that there is never an excuse for not being truthful with the woman that you love. I just want to extend my deepest apologies and tell you that I’m heartbroken at the idea that I could lose you over this. You mean so much to me.
How can I make this up to you? What are some of things I can do that will start to restore your trust in me?
Please call me. I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but I hope you’ll give me a chance to make things right. I love you, and I should never have told you a lie for any reason. I will never do it again.
15. Dear [Name or Term of Endearment],
I’m writing this letter because in the last couple of days, I couldn’ seem to understand why you have been so cold to me. I kept thinking why until I figured something out, which I hope is the real reason behind the distance you’ve been showing.
If I’m right, you are mad at me not because of what I did but because of what I didn’t do. I have made you feel insecure, taken for granted, and unloved. This was not supposed to happen. I was in the wrong, and I sincerely apologize for that.
I understand I’ve hurt you, perhaps unintentionally, but this was still not supposed to happen because I promised to keep you happy as much as I could. I got a little too busy at work that I hardly noticed what was going on.
As I was contemplating earlier today, I realized how sad and uncomfortable you must have been knowing I wasn’t around when you needed me the most. You must have had a hard time explaining things to your friends and family when they asked you about how we are and what’s going on.
Jane, please know that the last thing I wanted to do in this world is to hurt you. Right now, all I ever want to do is to make things right, no matter what it takes.
Please know that because I made the decision to love you from day one, I will do everything within my power to make this work.
I don’t expect you to accept my apology right away. Also, I won’t make any specific promises in this letter either because I don’t want to disappoint you ever again.
But, you can rely on the fact that I will do whatever it takes in the coming days, weeks, months, and even years to make you feel the same way as before, or even more.
16. Dearest [Name],
I am writing this letter not because I want to defend myself for what happened over the weekend but to apologize to you with utmost sincerity.
First, please know that Valerie that nothing intimate is going on between me and Valerie. As I may have mentioned to you before, she used to be one of my closest friends back in high school.
She has a special space in my heart because she was the only person who stood by me when everybody else didn’t have the courage to. For that, I dearly treasure her as a friend, and I’m one-hundred percent sure that she feels the same way too.
In fact, I learned last weekend that she has already been engaged to her Italian boyfriend Fabian. She wanted to meet me because she wanted to give the invitation card that you can also find in the envelope where I put this letter.
Honey, please know that you have all the right to feel the way you do, and that even makes me feel assured that you still love me as much as before. Thank you so much for that.
Also, please know that my eyes, heart, and mind are all set on no one elese but you alone. Yes, Valerie did make an impact on my life before but that was incomparable with how you have helped me become the best version of myself in the last couple of years. For that, I sincerely thank you for just being born.
I have arranged a simple yet special dinner for the two of us. If you think you are ready to accept my apology, please come to Royal Grill at seven this evening. I’ll be waiting for you.
17. Dear [Name],
Jane, no words to express how much I regret forgetting our anniversary. Yes, I admit that it has totally slipped my mind, and I genuinely apologize for that.
You have all the right to feel horrible about what happened, and I am ready to accept any consequences. But apart from that, I would also like to let you know that really want to make up to you, as long as you are willing to give me the chance to and tell me what to do.
I do know that what I did is unforgivable, and you may not even want to talk to me anytime soon. But, please know that I will be patiently waiting for you every day to open up.
When that time comes, I hope I can schedule a weekend getaway with you either to the beach or the mountain. I know you are also busy with work, but I hope you can find some time for this trip. I love you.
18. To the love of my life,
An apology may not be enough to make you feel better, but I sincerely hope you can still forgive me.
I may not be very good with words, but I want you to know that you have always been my world.
I wish I could take back what I’ve said to you the other day, but I know I can’t. So, instead, I wrote this letter to let you know how much you matter to me. I can’t take this silent treatment any longer because I miss how your voice sounds, especially when laughing. So, please, let us stop this fight.
You are the best thing that happened in my life, and I would give up everything just to make you happy again. Just let me know where and how to start, so we can make this work again.
You are the love of my life.
19. To my one and only [name],
How have you been? Mad at me, of course. I totally understand that. But, I also don’t want to let you stay mad at me for more than a day because it hurts me a lot.
I am writing this letter not to just apologize for what I did wrong but to remind you that you are the most beautiful best gift I’ve ever had in my lifetime. I can’t bear losing you in any way, so I will be very careful with my words and actions from now on.
As we both promised before, we would never let a single fight destroy all the years we have endured together. I love you, and I know you love me too. So, let’s stop this fight, shall we?
Please give me a chance to make this right, Jane.
Writing Your Own Apology Letter to Your Beloved Girlfriend
One thing you might notice in the examples above is most of them are very specific about naming the thing the person did that was wrong.
It’s important to be concrete and acknowledge your error instead of just talking vaguely about doing something wrong.
This shows your girlfriend that you’re acknowledging the specific action.
In addition, you need to straightforwardly say that you are sorry somewhere in the letter.
Finally, while it is okay to provide an explanation for your behavior, that explanation should never be an excuse.
You should take full responsibility for your actions, and ideally, you should explain what you are going to do differently in the future.
You can see other examples of a similar approach in how to write an apology letter for being disrespectful.
At best, your apology letter will get your girlfriend to come back to you, but if it doesn’t, you will still be a better person for having thought about what you did wrong, for making the decision to change and for having the strength of character to issue an unconditional and loving apology for your actions.
Hey fellow Linguaholics! It’s me, Marcel. I am the proud owner of linguaholic.com. Languages have always been my passion and I have studied Linguistics, Computational Linguistics and Sinology at the University of Zurich. It is my utmost pleasure to share with all of you guys what I know about languages and linguistics in general.